There’s a kind of general cultural vibe that says that as long as your baby is healthy and your hair isn’t on fire, you shouldn’t complain. But we all have days/weeks where ‘lousy’ is a euphemism, and especially for new moms whose lives have just turned upside down anyway, it can be hard to take.
So, I really like this post from Meagan Francis’ lovely blog, which lists five things moms can do when they’re in a funk. Her suggestions:
- Go for a walk
- Take a bath
- Clean something
- Consume some non-computer media
- Engage in a mentally stimulating activity.
It helps a lot to have a list there at those moments when you’re so funky you can’t even think straight. I suggest you make one for yourself.
I have a list like this stored as a memo in my phone. Then, if I’m walking around and positive that Everything Is Shit, I can click on a button and get visited by a saner version of myself who is saying, Darling, everything is not shit. But don’t sit here stewing in your own juices. Go for a freaking walk.
There are some things on my list that aren’t on Meagan’s. They include:
- Call a friend. I actually listed a few friends’ names because sometimes when Everything Is Shit I need really specific reminders of, like, who I like.
- Exercise. Underneath, I wrote: “If even seeing the word ‘exercise’ makes you feel like throwing the phone, it is good evidence that you should go to the gym asap.”
- Chocolate. One day the medicinal value will be clearly established and I will feel validated for taking chocolate syrup in a medicine cup.
- Sex. I feel like this is all I’m blogging about lately, but you know it does help, people! Go it alone if necessary ;-)
- Prayer. Meditation would work, too, if you’re not a praying type of person.
- Call a friend. I have this one in twice in case I ignored it the first time. Because reaching out to someone who loves you is probably the thing that will restore you more than anything.
Here’s the thing. I don’t always remember to look at the note in my phone! Neither will you. There’s really no avoiding the occasional funk, and there’s no magic way to get out of it instantly. But this stuff is a good place to start.